Co-Parenting with a Narcissist


Co-parenting with a narcissistic ex-partner can be an incredibly challenging experience. Narcissists often exhibit controlling and manipulative behavior, making it difficult to establish a healthy co-parenting relationship. However, effective communication is crucial for the well-being of your children. In this article, we will explore some powerful phrases that can help navigate co-parenting with a narcissist while maintaining your sanity and promoting a positive environment for your children.

Co-Parenting with a Narcissist

1. “Let’s Focus on the Kids”:

When dealing with a narcissistic co-parent, it’s important to keep the conversation centered around the well-being of your children. By redirecting the focus onto your shared responsibility as parents, you can help diffuse potential conflicts and remind the narcissist of the ultimate goal – providing a stable and supportive environment for your children.

2. “I Appreciate Your Perspective”:

Narcissists often have an inflated sense of self-importance and believe their opinions are always superior. Acknowledging their perspective, even if you disagree, can help avoid unnecessary arguments. By validating their viewpoint, you can disarm their defensiveness and create a more constructive atmosphere for discussion.

3. “Let’s Find a Compromise”:

Narcissists tend to view co-parenting as a battleground where they must win at all costs. Instead of engaging in power struggles, suggest finding compromises that benefit both parties. By presenting the idea as a mutual agreement, you may increase the chances of reaching a resolution that works for everyone involved.

4. “Can We Discuss This Later?”:

Narcissists often thrive on confrontation and drama. To prevent unnecessary conflict, it can be helpful to postpone discussions on sensitive topics to a more appropriate time. This allows you to gather your thoughts, approach the conversation with a level head, and avoid getting entangled in heated arguments.

5. “Let’s Keep Communication Civil”:

Narcissists may try to provoke you with inflammatory remarks or personal attacks. Responding with calmness and emphasizing the importance of civil communication sets a positive example for your children. By maintaining your composure, you can undermine the narcissist’s attempts to incite further conflict.

6. “I Will Confirm That in Writing”:

When dealing with a narcissistic co-parent, it is crucial to document important decisions and agreements. By offering to confirm discussions in writing, such as via email or text, you create a record of the conversation. This not only helps prevent misunderstandings but also holds the narcissist accountable for their promises and actions.

7. “Let’s Seek Professional Advice”:

Engaging the services of a family therapist or mediator can be beneficial when co-parenting with a narcissist. Suggesting professional assistance demonstrates your commitment to finding solutions and promoting a healthier co-parenting dynamic. A neutral third party can provide guidance, facilitate communication, and help establish boundaries that protect the best interests of your children.

Recommended Article: Co-Parenting Boundaries While in a New Relationship


Co-parenting with a narcissist requires patience, resilience, and effective communication skills. By utilizing these phrases, you can navigate the challenges with grace and minimize the negative impact on your children. Remember, your primary focus should always be the well-being and happiness of your kids.

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